My last newsletter was written as I was heading down to Phoenix.Almost a month later, I am writing on the last leg of the flight back to Vancouver.It’s been a very busy month, a lot has been accomplished and I am officially a year older than the last time I wrote.
I got to spend my birthday last weekend with Greg in Sedona.He flew into Phoenix on Thursday evening and we drove to Sedona on Friday afternoon.I have wanted to visit Sedona for a couple of years now and it was everything that I wanted it to be.The red rocks of Sedona are quite simply breath-taking.For some great photos, please visit my photo gallery at www.janjanzen.com/gallery.htm and take a look for yourself.
On the morning of my birthday, we did a tour of the area with a spiritual guide, a part native Indian woman named Maya Starhawk.We were mesmerized by the fascinating names like Coffeepot Mountain, Bell Rock, Chimney Mountain and Cathedral Rock.Besides being stunningly gorgeous, there is tremendous healing energy in the vortexes in Sedona.
Although I was more than tired from having put in about 300 hours at the office over the past three weeks, we decided to make the most of our precious time in Sedona.That afternoon we did two short hikes up separate mountains.As we sat at the top of the one vista point, in 95 degree temperatures, a wind came up just as Maya said it would.She told us it was the spirits blessing us.On the next hike up Cochina Woman, I sat nestled in the mountain’s lap and faced Cochina Man.Greg and I watched the sun set over the mountains and felt the temperature drop to a cooler 80 degrees or so.
That night we were unexpectedly treated to a beautiful, romantic birthday dinner by a friend.There is something delightful about ordering dinner and never seeing the bill.
The following morning Greg and I did our longest hike up Coffeepot Mountain.We trekked through the desert under the blazing sun, crossing a gully as the lizards scurried across the path.Both Greg and I marveled at the variety of color found in the desert and the amazing hardiness of the desert foliage.We sat at the base of Coffeepot and soaked in the powerful energy of the mountain.
Later that afternoon, we set out on another hike to find the Seven Sacred Pools.They aren’t on the map but Maya assured us that we would find them.As we ventured off the designated paths and the sun was about an hour from setting, we realized that we needed to turn back.Disappointed we headed back to the car. As we were on the trail back, a woman was coming in the opposite direction. We stopped her and asked if she knew where the Seven Sacred Pools were.She very kindly offered to lead us to the pools which despite the heat, never dry up.Although the water is stagnant and looked unappealing, Greg who is a water fanatic, was m ost impressed with the healing power in the waters.It was a really neat experience to feel guided in finding the pools.
On Monday morning, before leaving Sedona and heading to Las Vegas, Greg and I visited the Chapel of the Holy Cross, an architectural marvel built in the Red Rocks.The vision of a woman who nearly needed an Act of Congress back in the early 1950’s to get the permits approved to build the church on government property - this beautiful church stands as a tremendous testament to the power of a woman’s foresight and determination.
After lunch in Sedona, Greg and I crossed the desert and arrived in Las Vegas as the sun was setting.As we crossed the Hoover Dam just before Las Vegas, I didn’t know that it took the brilliance of more than 200 scientists to achieve this architectural masterpiece.Started in 1931, it was completed in 1936, 2 years ahead of schedule because of stiff fines for going over schedule.This was all done before the age of computers and the sophisticated equipment available today.
I don’t know if there could have been a greater dichotomy than lunch in one of the most spiritual places in the world and dinner in one of the worldliest cities in the world - Las Vegas.I have flown into Vegas on a number of occasions but it was a very different perspective driving through hours of desert to arrive in the bustling environment of Vegas.A very full business schedule didn’t leave a lot of time to play in Vegas but Greg and I walked part of the Strip, ate a wonderful seafood buffet and watched the fountains outside of the Bellagio.rent a car bulgaria
It’s back to Vancouver for about 6 weeks before I leave again for Mexico.There is a definite advantage to living out of 3 suitcases.The flexibility is tremendous and I learned to function remarkably well at the Extended Stay in Phoenix with limited cutlery, 1 pot, 1 frying pan and a can opener.I ate well, lost a couple more pounds (now down 22 pounds since the middle of May) and even cooked a couple of dinners with very limited ingredients.
I really learned firsthand that when someone is on purpose, there is no challenge or obstacle that is too great, too frustrating, or too overwhelming.The pace was intense as we launched the new Plexus Pink on September 2nd. However, I have adopted my dear friend Monique’s motto for life - correct and continue.
Most people when faced with challenges “react and retreat”.When life isn’t perfect, when things don’t go as easily as you believe they should, when everything doesn’t come served on a silver platter, then it’s easy to throw in the towel and quit.That’s a “react and retreat” response.
Correct and continue means that you don’t get sidelined or thrown out of the game.You simply correct the move, adjust, be flexible and continue on to get the job done.When the task is big, the challenges usually match the prize.That has definitely been true of the past month.But when I looked at this beautiful chapel built against all odds and drove over the Hoover Dam, it reinforced for me the power of vision and overcoming the obstacles. It strengthened my resolve to do that as President of Plexus Pink.
If you find yourself copping out, retreating and slowing down because of the pressure, then ask yourself if you’re really in your passion.Does what you are doing feel right?Are you avoiding something that you really want to do because you don’t know how to do it?Is your mode of operation, react and retreat or correct and continue?
Life is energizing, the results are supernatural, and I feel more at home at Plexus Pink than anything I have ever done.How’s that for the best birthday present in the world?
The other day while speaking to my dear friend Peter about what was happening in my life, he used a term that caught my attention. He said, “the issue Jan is IJR.” I replied with “what the heck is IJR”? I thought maybe I had missed a new technology term while in Mexico. Quite simply, IJR stands for “Is Jan Ready?” The conversation after that question was fascinating, perhaps even relevant to what is going on in your life.
Have you noticed that sometimes you don’t get what you want? You may have done your vision board, your God jar, your list of what you want in your life and it isn’t showing up. You’ve read the books, done the workshops, and watched The Secret a dozen times.However, after my conversation with Peter my latest question for my clients is: Are you ready? Ready for what you want, ready for what you are intending to manifest, ready for all the good things you know you deserve. Are you ready for a larger life, more money, a fabulous relationship, a terrific business, or a new home? Honestly, are you ready for the next step?
I bet that if you really look at what has happened to you over the last five years, life has been a fascinating journey. I know that over five years ago when I started writing this monthly newsletter, life was very different than what it looks like now. However, at the time as I was developing Women Empowering Women in the Vancouver area, I was very clear on my large vision for the empowerment of women. I knew what power women had that just needed focus, leadership and a clear vision to accomplish amazing things in the world. Yet at the same time, as things started to move towards that goal, something didn’t feel right. Despite the success at the time, it just wasn’t meant to happen. The market was ready, almost frothing at the mouth for it, but Jan wasn’t ready. Women Empowering Women died a most untimely death because I didn’t have what I needed to have to do what I dreamt of doing.
Lots of things happened in the meantime - a trip to South Africa that changed my life, a book released, another one now written, a serious relationship with an amazing man, and living in Mexico. And perhaps the most relevant to the journey is the very recent promotion to President of Plexus Pink, the network marketing company that is all about the empowerment of women.
What’s fascinating is that I noticed the shift happen earlier this spring. It was like something inside of me clicked. Perhaps as I watched women, no more or less gifted or qualified than me, doing some pretty remarkable things. Maybe it was the blossoming of an ardent desire to find my voice on stage again. Perhaps it was a deep calling that powerful leadership is sorely needed in the world today. Something re-ignited that vision of empowering women. I don’t know. I just know that one day, as much as I was arguing for a continued hiatus on the beaches of Mexico, the Universe was calling me to greater callings. I argued - more because I thought I should to just be sure there wasn’t a mistake - but I also knew that I was ready.
You may or may not understand what I am describing. You may not yet have that longing in your soul to be larger than you currently are. You may still be wondering when that big picture for you is going to show up or if it even will. Perhaps you don’t even want it to as you’re in the “rest” phase I spoke about last month and you may even be hoping that rest phase doesn’t end.
On the other hand, you could know exactly what I am talking about and you are well on your way. If that’s the case, I bet there are some interesting emotions coming up for you. Fear, doubt, anxiety, worry and some trepidation along with the excitement and joy are usually a pretty common mix. Perhaps you are still arguing with the Universe about the calling and doubting whether or not you are ready.
Can I offer a few suggestions? If you aren’t feeling a huge calling to some massive project or direction, then relax and enjoy where you are right now. If it’s peaceful where you’re at, then that’s perfect. There is nothing wrong or bad with that. Just ask yourself honestly if you are blocking out a message or shutting out the voice.
If you are getting a message but don’t know what to do about it as it doesn’t appear particularly clear, there may be a critical step missing. Have you said YES to the Universe? Have you agreed and told the Universe that you are ready? Did you finish the enrollment process or do you still doubt, worry and need to be in control?
One of my clients decided recently to make a major shift in her lifestyle. Tired of the large overhead for a life that no longer suited, Paula and her husband put just about everything with a monthly price tag up for sale. Trailer, truck, horse and house all went on the block as they started looking at ways to simplify their life. However, she mentioned that she recently realized that she hadn’t really said YES to selling the ranch. There weren’t any nibbles on the property either although everything else had moved out of their life quite nicely. Once Paula and her husband got really clear that they were ready to let go of the ranch there was immediate activity. Real estate agents started calling and a flurry of interest appeared out of nowhere. Isn’t that interesting? My client, appreciated that she was experiencing an IPR - Is Paula Ready moment?
The Universe doesn’t force us to grow. It doesn’t push us into situations that ensure our personal development. It doesn’t hold us hostage to our Assignment for this lifetime. It merely provides the vehicles, opportunities, people and situations for us to show up. It promises us the support and guidance, direction and love but we have to take the first steps. We have to partner with the Universe - this isn’t a dictatorship.
So have you partnered with the Universe or are you holding back? Have you said YES, I will do whatever it takes to be everything I am here to be? Are you willing to be open to a different vehicle or venue than you thought was most likely. Interestingly, three of my long-term clients discovered recently that what I saw for them very clearly more than a year ago has come full circle for the second time. The first time they started down the path I suggested, they pulled back, uncertain and afraid. Of course the Universe gave them the breathing room and continued to support them until they were ready the next time it showed up. Sure enough, all three of them are moving into amazing Assignments that are big, powerful, potentially lucrative and feel right for them at a soul level. Twelve months ago, 18 months ago, 24 months ago, they weren’t ready. Today they are the Universe and I are celebrating their progress.
How can you get ready if you aren’t but want to be? Look at what is really holding you back. Are you afraid of failure? Are you afraid of success? Is it showing up differently than you thought so there is some stubbornness or pride getting in the way? Are you feeling impatient? I know that I personally didn’t want the responsibility, the commitment and the workload that goes with this Assignment…until now. Today as I am on a flight to Phoenix to the Home Office of Plexus Pink to spend the next few weeks, I am energized by the Assignment. I am constantly rising to the challenges with passion, feel a calmness despite the stress and am excited about the future. My vision for a powerful network of women is alive and strong. It is simply through a different vehicle than I would ever have thought. But I honestly didn’t feel this way just 9 months ago.
So know that the Universe may be ready and you may not be or you may be ready and the Universe is still lining up the parties. Relax and continue to say YES. Do your part and I promise you the Universe will do its part. Just be sure you are doing your part 100% - nothing held back, no reserves for the “just in case it doesn’t work” scenario. Give it your all and see what happens.
I’ve had a chance to watch a few minutes of the Olympics here and there over the last few weeks. There isn’t an athlete in Bejiing right now that isn’t giving it all they’ve got. They are living a dream, realizing the fruitage of a tremendous amount of hard work and coming to understand in a very practical way whether or not they were ready for that level of competition.
Right now, ask yourself if you’re ready. Put your initial into the IJR question and then be honest with yourself. It may give you some critical answers about your life.
The hill up to my friend Monique’s home, where I am currently staying, is long and steep. The first couple of weeks here, I never made it more than a quarter of the way up the hill before my heart was racing and I was out of breath. Then one day I decided to stop and take a 30 second break before heading up the hill. The difference in how far I could walk was amazing. The last two days I have made it all the way to the top without stopping!
It’s kind of like life. Sometimes we need to stop, catch our breath before we continue. However, we often do that with great resistance.
I have had a couple of clients this month tell me how tired they are. They’ve mentioned they have no “get-up-and-go”. There’s simply no energy to do any work and they are pushing themselves to do what it takes to get through the day. They’re looking for a magic bullet to get them fired up again.
Perhaps you know that feeling and wonder how you get the “get-up-and-go” to come back and stay!
Monique attended a workshop last year where she learned about a cycle of life that resonated with me when she first explained it. I think you will find this useful also.
There are four stages to the cycle. The first is work. You know the feeling where you are busy, busy, busy on a project or projects and you feel energized and ambitious. Nothing is too much work. You are motivated and inspired. But then something happens and all of sudden you feel confused, as if everything you are doing seems out of place or meaningless.
You are in the next stage of confusion or chaos. Perhaps you know that feeling only too well where your world feels upside down. It can even be frightening at times as if you have lost your vision, drive and clarity. What is recommended in this stage is to do some clearing and cleaning. It can help you move through the chaos faster. Even just knowing that this is a normal part of the life cycle helps me to relax when I hit this phase.
After the chaos comes the contemplation stage where the ideas start to gel and form again. Sanity returns and there is some peace.
The next stage is perhaps the most challenging for many of us Type A Personality types. It is the rest phase. It’s when you want to put your feet up, take life easy; you feel unmotivated, uninspired, worn out or even exhausted. Unfortunately, it is in this stage that most people push themselves, beat themselves up for not being more ambitious and feel terribly guilty about not wanting to do more.
However, this stage is so critical because the next phase is the work phase. Just like my climb up the hill - without that little rest, I am winded half-way up the hill. Take the rest and my results double!
I saw this happen in my life this year. Now being aware of the cycle, when my body was screaming for a sabbatical, I took it. I planned on a year - it lasted about 7 weeks! However, it was long enough to take me into a good stretch of work phase when I got another book written, along with many other projects.
None of these phases need to last for days, weeks, months or years. You may go through the entire cycle in a very short period of time. But you will go through them. Being aware of where you are in the cycle allows you to be more understanding and gentle with yourself. Instead of freaking out because you are feeling lost and confused and life seems topsy-turvy, you now can recognize it as the chaos phase. Rather than beat yourself up for wanting to rest, you can let go of the guilt and take the time for recuperation and rejuvenation, realizing that it will be followed by the work phase.
And when you feel driven to work and that takes a priority over everything else, you will understand why there is a strong urge to get things done.
Anytime I can understand myself, my cycles, my emotions and my programs better, I see it as a bonus. Learning about these cycles really increased my awareness this year of myself and contributed to greater productivity. It also makes my life easier because I understand that other people in my life may not be in the same phase as I am. There are days when Monique says to me, “Jan, just listening to you exhausts me.” We are rarely in the work phase at the same time. Other times, I will hear the confusion in my partner’s conversation and appreciate that he is simply in the chaos phase.
The greatest lesson for me is that there is a cycle of life and I cannot avoid it. Just as in nature, there is a time of rejuvenation and repair, a time of growth, and a time of quiet, our lives reflect that too. We just don’t always have the sense to honor and respect where we are at. Instead we push ourselves, feel guilty about taking time off and panic when life isn’t where we think it should be.
By now understanding these cycles, it has brought another level of peace to my life. I hope that it does for you also.
Enjoy the day. Treasure the cycle. And relax. It’s all perfect…it really is.
As I sit at the airport about to leave Mazatlan, I am definitely filled with gratitude mingled with a touch of sadness.I can’t believe that it was almost 6 months ago that Greg and I arrived, white-skinned and tired!Today I am leaving brown-skinned with a far more laid-back approach to life. It has been such an incredible time here on so many levels; it is indeed a time of reflection and gratitude.
I have certainly learned that there’s not much that’s really worth stressing about.People jay-walk as a matter of course, (I now do it all the time) cars cut each other off without even thinking, buses careen down the street with brakes squealing and young kids perform flame-throwing antics at an intersection and…nobody blinks an eye.
Buses don’t honk at the irresponsible pedestrian, nobody hollers or gives drivers the finger for cutting them off and people give the flame-thrower a few coins in appreciation.Life is definitely taken a whole lot less seriously here.It’s been refreshing.
I have come to appreciate at a whole new level that there is no point getting upset about what we cannot change.I went in for my first dentist appointment this month after a 45 minute bus trip through a part of Mazatlan I didn’t know.I found the dentist’s office, explained in Spanish that I had broken a tooth while in Vancouver and it needed a filling, only to have her explain that she had just run out of filling material.Her very sweet and innocent question to me was:“Can you come back tomorrow?”I nearly burst out laughing.It had taken almost 3 hours out of my jam-packed day to have her tell me that she didn’t have what she needed to fix my tooth.Wasn’t she a dentist for heaven’s sake?However, there was no point stressing about it so I simply arranged to come back - three more times to be exact for all of the dental work I needed, about eight hours worth.The bill for everything was $220.
I am certainly grateful for the incredible kindnesses that have been shown me.While riding the bus one day a couple of weeks ago, I left a bag behind with a dress and an expensive pair of shoes.One of the passengers must have noticed and the bus driver stopped the bus and honked to get my attention.I had already crossed the street but turned back when I heard the honking as buses so rarely honk their horns!He held up my precious bag of belongings and a passenger met me on the sidewalk with it.Needless to say, I was thrilled to have my bag back.It’s been wonderful to experience the goodness and honesty of peop le, even when they have a lot less than I do.
I have to admit that I love the fact that when you walk past a condo building under construction, and there are plenty of them around, lots of the men working above stop and whistle!I haven’t been whistled at since I was a teenager and I don’t even remember it happening very often then!At 46, I love it!It’s fun and innocent as they practice their English and call out, “Good morning lady!”
There is a lovely gentleness about the Mexicans that I really admire.Their strong sense of family is beautiful to see.I have loved watching the families gather on the beach in front of my condo every weekend and spend time with their children, having their picnic and listening to the children shriek with delight as they play in the waves.
It’s certainly been fun to connect with the foreigners that ride the buses.Some of them look quite out of place in their expensive jewelry and clothes.I’m sure that at home they drive very nice cars but here they ride the bus with the locals for eighty cents.I love it!The camaraderie amongst the foreigners is most delightful as I can get on a bus, spot the tourists and have a great conversation, helping somebody out or sharing my experience of living here.
What a joy to experience so many ways to give back.Many of the foreigners at the condo really go above and beyond for the employees and other locals.They support them in their arts and crafts; they give them clothes and household items, sometimes even bringing back things that the locals want from the StatesI gave away a bunch of clothes that were too big (yeah!) to my lovely housekeeper which felt so good.I have brought back MP3 players and digital cameras for some of the great employees here.Many who live in the building recently organized a massive party for all the children of the employees and fed over 150 people with games and gifts for everyone, a ll supported by our contributions.
It probably helps a lot that people on holidays are in a good mood.I have felt so blessed to be surrounded by people who are either short-term tourists or are here for part of the year.Between the happy foreigners and the delightful locals, it is definitely easy to be happy.If I ever doubted that your environment affects your moods, I have had it confirmed here.I am now a fervent sun-worshipper.I just love waking up almost every morning to sunshine and blue sky.I absolutely love the warm, sunny weather here and know that I will make Mexico “home” for some time to come, in part because of the tremendous amount of sunshine they get!
Despite a very busy schedule, I have regularly taken time to sit and watch the sunset, something I never seemed to have had time for before now.I have gone for frequent walks along the beach and taken time out to just sit and be silent as I watch the ocean and birds.It is so peaceful to just “be” in beautiful surroundings, listening to the ocean, and appreciating how blessed I truly am.Making my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health a priority really has made a huge difference.
And I have never forgotten my experience with Gloria, the Mexican woman who lived in shambles and was so hospitable, kind and proud of what she had accomplished, caring for her numerous grandchildren.I often have thought of her when I was cursing the hot water that never got really hot or the cold water that never got really cold.I remembered to just be grateful for the running water, no matter what the temperature!Gloria is one of my stories in my new book.
So yes, it has been a very hectic six months.Yes, there is still a part of me that longs for a “real” sabbatical, but I feel excited about the future like I haven’t felt for a long time.There’s a feeling in the air that very good things and very big things are going to come fast and furious now.
One of the things that I encourage my clients to do is to say YES to the Universe.Part of the reason that people don’t have the kind of amazing life they desire is because they haven’t accepted the bigness of it, the powerfulness of it and the uncertainty of what’s in store for them.They want to know all the answers before they surrender.It doesn’t work that way.Say YES first and then watch what incredible things come your way.
Where will I be a year from now?I have NO idea!How exciting is that!I do know that it will be absolutely perfect if these past six months are any indication.
I also know that the four months back in Canada will fly by very quickly.I am looking forward to seeing some friends, my sweetheart Greg and getting some business looked after. However, I am very aware that I am leaving part of my heart in
Mexico.I’m already counting the days until I get to come “home” again.
I remember when last December I told you that I was moving to Mexico, I wrote that Spirit would lead and I would follow.I had visions of days sun tanning by the pool, reading delightful books, learning my Tai Chi and sipping some exotic drink.A sabbatical in the sun…how appealing!
I can barely stop laughing at how the last five months have evolved.Obviously the Universe and I have very different definitions of what a sabbatical looks like!
I have been back to Vancouver twice on high-powered, busy as all-get-out business trips including several speaking engagements.I have just completed my 60,000 word manuscript for my next book due out this fall.My client schedule, although reduced, still keeps me hopping with appointments 5 days a week. Then working with my dearest friend Monique, the brand-new Sacred Gifts website will be online within the next 10 days, and the home study program ready for this fall.AND last but certainly not least, my life partner Greg and his business partner bought a network marketing company two months ago and I became the VP of Personal and Business Development.In less than a month, I leave
Mexico to return to BC for 4 months to work on the network company with the CEO, to get my book to print, and God knows what else.Seriously!I don’t mean that facetiously.Only God knows what else!
In working with a client last week, she told me that she wanted to work with me because I am a successful author and seem to be busy speaking on top of a very active client practice.She wondered what my business and marketing plans looked like.It was pretty funny telling her that I don’t have any.I confessed that the sum total of my business and marketing plans these days sound something like this every morning:“I don’t know what you have planned for me God, but I am sure it’s good.I am so excited to find out.”And then I get to work with what the day has brought and it certainly never fails to bring excitement!
I don’t think any business plan could have foreseen Greg and Alfred buying Plexus Pink, a network marketing company that was all about early detection of breast cancer and is now evolving into a company about breast health.I have been test-marketing (along with several of my clients), a breast cream that Greg developed last year with Spirulina algae as its base.Plexus Pink, the obvious home for this cream was not for sale and it wasn’t looking at all possible that a deal would be struck with the management anytime soon.Then out of the blue, the former owner got cancer and it was an almost immediate transfer of power.A breast company without a woman in corporate?That didn’t sit well with Greg and Alfred and so I was asked by two of my most favorite men in the world if I would step up to the plate as VP.
It certainly wasn’t what I had intended this year - but as the laying by the pool for hours, reading countless books and basically relaxing hadn’t happened either, I decided to seriously contemplate the offer.It’s now been 4 weeks in the role and although I have no idea how we are going to get everything done that needs to get done, except by sheer miracles and the grace of God, I have learned to have fun with this assignment!
Why am I telling you this?Because one of the things that I am seeing in my new role in this company is that people worry an awful lot.They worry about stuff that may never happen, probably won’t happen and is almost impossible to happen.Why do people have such an addiction to worry?It’s not like it feels good, last time I checked. I’ve actually heard people say that if they didn’t have anything to worry about, that made them worry!
So my most ardent suggestion to you is STOP worrying!It’s simply not worth it.STOP asking so many questions about the HOW of everything and start exercising some faith and trust that things will work out.
I may sound flippant about my lack of business and marketing plans for 2008 but there is nothing casual about how I direct my life.It’s why it works and it works well.I am very clear on the quality of life that I expect.I am crystal clear on the level of contribution I wish to make to this planet before I die.I have totally surrendered to the Universe on HOW that happens.I live every day in a place of peace, joy, love and prosperity.
I demand a lot from my life and I am a very exacting tenant here on planet Earth.I expect to be supported and while I do my share, I absolutely, totally expect the Universe to do its part. Monique tells me that I have a radical relationship with the Universe. Maybe I do, maybe I just push the limits further than most.What I do know, is that it works, which is exceedingly clear in my next story.
Greg and I decided that we wanted to come back to Mexico together in November and be here for about 7 months.We knew that we wanted a beautiful, elegant, spacious house or condo with ocean views and we were very clear on our price range.Quite serendipitously, while in Vancouver attending a large event of more than 500 people, a woman approached me who had met me last November at the Sacred Gifts workshop.She had connected me in November with a woman she knew in
Mexico but I had never followed up with her.Vicki spotted me out of this large crowd and asked me if I had connected with her friend, who now of all things was…you guessed it…a property manager in Puerto Vallarta.
Not being slow to the draw, I picked that up as a BIG clue and contacted Drucilla last week, told her what Greg and I were looking for and sent her off looking.It wasn’t an easy task based on the number of months we wanted, the price we wanted and the long list of amenities we wanted but all three of us, Drucilla, Greg and I were clear, we would manifest the perfect home.Miracle after miracle happened and this week we just received notice that our new home in Bucerias, outside of Puerto Vallarta is waiting for us November 1st.Four bedrooms, four bathrooms, 8 pools, ocean views everywhere, this luxurious, deluxe condo is perfect for Greg, his 96 year old mother, and I to spend next winter.Even the little dog is allowed!
I have watched people plan their lives down to the second, worry about every little detail, fret about every penny and get very little for all their effort.I have also seen people have a laissez-faire attitude towards life, a “whatever” attitude, a roll with the punches and take what I get belief, and they often wonder why life doesn’t treat them better.
I don’t believe that either approach works.I have seen personally that clarity is critical - that magical question:What do I really want?Faith and trust in oneself is imperative.Lose the “I am not good enough to have what I want” attitude.Belief in a Higher Power really helps as doing it alone is harder than it needs to be.Confidence that you can manifest the life of your dreams is critical.Why can’t you?You’re already manifesting the life you are living now - why can’t a few things be modified and changed for the better.Find a balance between needing to know all the details and allowing the magic to occur.
I start every single day in conversation with God about the great day we have planned together.Every night I end the day filled with gratitude for all the surprises, unexpected treats that I had no idea were coming, and for the support I feel in the amazing people I attract in my life.It’s a business and life plan I’m sticking with because it works.You may wish to adopt some aspects of it and see what miracles you can create in your life.
The rat ran across the road in front of the vehicle.Pat, the woman sitting next to me, covered her face and shrieked.I was fascinated at how different the rat looked from the rats I had seen running around my cabin in Vancouver a few years ago.This one looked more like the Hunchback of Notre Dame and no, he wasn’t wearing a Mexican sombrero!
There was a time when I would have had a similar reaction to Pat’s, but things have changed.This time there was no fear or revulsion, just a calm intrigue that surprised even me.I used to be terrified of rodents but after dealing with them for almost a year in the cabin, I learned to co-exist and tolerate them.We all tolerate lots of things - much of it unconsciously.That can be good as it helps us to deal with uncomfortable situations - like a rat infestation - or events that we have no control over like the weather, but there is also a downside to our tolerance. People have become complacent, apathetic, and resigned to a standard of living, a way of being and a ho-hum existence believing that “it’s just the way it is”.Not true!If you are doing that, please take this as a wake-up call.You deserve so much more!Friends, clients along with people I meet every day here in Mexico are fascinated that I now live here.Living in a foreign country seems so exotic, so special and so, well…foreign.And to the typical North American working a 9 - 5 job, driving in rush hour every day, living through severe weather conditions, life on the beach in Mexico would seem exotic.
What’s interesting is that hundreds of thousands of people are doing it.I am truly not alone.Mexico for example has more foreigners living here than the rest of South America combined.I met a man the other evening while swimming in the pool who has lived in Mexico for 28 years.Judy, my 70-year-old boogie boarder friend, has lived in this condo for 24 years.Lots of people are doing it and more are coming every year.It’s seriously not that unusual.
The more I live the lifestyle that I have created here in Mexico, the more I realize how much we tolerate what we think is “all we can have.”False! We put up with people, situations, living conditions, bank accounts and our health like they were fore-ordained, unchangeable, written in stone.None of it is!I mean that. None of our life is written in stone.You can change absolutely anything and everything in your life.You just need to stop tolerating it, putting up with it and accepting it as good enough for you, and then take a different course of action.
For example, people get rid of disease all the time.We’ve just been convinced that cancer, MS, arthritis and every other ailment is incurable but I know people who have beat every one of those diseases and no longer tolerated them in their life.People who were absolutely broke with nothing, homeless and destitute have gone on to create empires.Everything is possible.
Here in Mazatlan, much of the city is owned by the El Cid corporation.I learned that the man behind the real estate empire was originally an orphan from the Spanish Civil War.The Mexican government took in many of the orphans and this one proved to be a tremendous entrepreneur.Don Julio Berdegue literally revolutionized the development of Mazatlan and a year after his death, his mark is clearly evident.I am fascinated how an orphan could so magnificently affect an entire city.He was apparently an outspoken, driven pioneer i n the arena of real estate development who has his share of enemies in the city but is also admired for his foresight and contribution to Mazatlan.
How many of us would have been so bold, so creative and so determined under very difficult circumstances?I think of people like Senor Berdegue often as I make choices in my life. I think, “if he could do it, so can I.”That can seem like a very trite statement but if you really got clear on what that means, it’s incredibly powerful.So what do you want to do that you’re not doing?Start thinking.
Mexicans are lovely people and their country is remarkably rich, diverse and abundance in its resources. Mexico could truly accomplish whatever it wanted to, but you know the same is true of every country.And more importantly, the same is true of every person.
When I lived in Ecuador, the Otavalan Indians were exceptional.While the majority of the indigenous tribes lived in squalor and poverty, the Otavalan tribe created beautiful arts and crafts and traveled the world selling their goods. They didn’t tolerate poverty and squalor but did something with their artistic gifts and many today are very, very wealthy.
Why do we tolerate what we don’t like in our life?I think it’s because we’re afraid to make changes.We know “this”, we don’t know “that”.We believe we’re not capable of making the changes - the “I’m not good enough, smart enough, rich enough” program.We don’t think we deserve anything better than what we’ve had - the “this is how everybody lives so why should I think I am any different” mentality.
I’ve had clients work with me who after a few sessions are angry because they can’t stand the mess they’re living in or they are now really unhappy with their weight issues or disgusted with their bank account.None of that worsened since we started working together, but what shifted was their attitude and perception towards it.As we worked on building their self-esteem, they realized that they deserved better and were no longer satisfied with what they had once tolerated.
I refuse to tolerate negativity, poverty and stress in my life.People who are whiny, complaining and negative, don’t last long in my company. I refuse to scrimp, worry about money or not have “more than enough” to look after myself.And the minute I feel stress that is higher than my tolerance level, I am all over who, what or why there is more stress.Is it arrogant to feel that way?No, but you may be thinking that it is.Believe me - it has required a massive shift in thinking on my part to get here.Today I would NOT tolerate rats running up and down my bathroom walls as I once did but I know that I am still t olerating mediocrity in some areas of my life and constantly am working at raising the bar.
Are you being too demanding in your life?Or are you being too arrogant to ask for abundance, calmness, great people, joy, peace, love and prosperity in your life?Hardly!I bet you are not being nearly demanding enough!
It’s time to step up to the plate and get in the game.Start living life fully.There are so many exciting things to do that you really want to do, isn’t there? Start today.Make a list of what you are tolerating and start changing your attitude from helplessness and powerlessness to one of creativity, manifestation and action.
If an orphan from Spain can literally change a city’s landscape, you can change the landscape in your life.Go for it. You have everything to gain!
As Greg and I sat in the thermal pools in Harrison Hot Springs last month, I grabbed both his hands and said, “let’s set an intention for our few days together. I intend that we have a relaxing time, great food, fun and laughter, a good time together AND” I added with a twinkle in my eye, “that I win every game of Parcheesi.” Greg grinned at me and then laughed.
As we played six games over the next two days, I won every game. The first game I was so far behind it was ludicrous and then miraculously, I beat Greg hands down. Six games, six stunning, against-all-odds victories. It was like watching miracle after miracle on a gameboard.
Was I excited? You bet! Not so much about winning, although that always makes me happy, but about how powerful a little intention in the hot springs had proved to be. Greg later told me that during those six games, he felt almost helpless and hopeless about playing against me, as if the odds were absolutely against him no matter what.
Many times while I am in the pool here at the condo in Mazatlan, visitors will ask me how long I am staying. When I tell them that I have rented the condo until the 15th of October, they are stunned. Many do stay for a few months but rarely does a renter stay for the better part of a year! How did I manage to rent a place for an entire nine months at the last minute is inevitably their next question? When I tell them the incredible story (see January’s blog ) they are even more amazed. I have come to realize that it was about as miraculous as winning six games of Parcheesi in a row as it was to find an ocean-front condo for a reasonable price for nine months in peak season at the last minute.
I’m really getting into the miraculous power of intention and have set some bigger and more exciting intentions for this year. Seriously, what is the difference between a board game, a relationship, a home or a seven-figure income? I don’t think there’s much difference at the giving end - just at the receiving end. So I trust that the Universe can give me what I want. I just need to focus on being an excellent receiver and isn’t that the most fun part.
What I learned from these two stories is detachment and unwavering trust. I seriously didn’t think about that intention I had set in the hot springs as I sat down to play the first game of Parcheesi with Greg that night. I just played the game like always, although I noticed that I felt more confident and more attentive to the game. It was like I was on high alert at a sub-conscious level. It was a very interesting feeling.
In talking about finding my condo so miraculously, I realized that in my mind, right from the start, I had an association that because I speak Spanish I would find a place to live. Honestly, there is no real correlation between the two, except in my mind, and that’s all that was needed for success. That is a very key point. Isn’t there a saying, “What you believe, you will achieve.”
Focus is another critical part as I saw very clearly this past week. Last Wednesday, one of my clients from Vancouver, along with her son, came into Mazatlan by cruise ship. We arranged to meet and spend the day together touring Mazatlan together. One of our first stops was the cliff divers. Young men climb a 45 foot tower and then dive into the water below that may be just five feet deep or less. You can see pictures at www.janjanzen.com under Around Mazatlan.
The diving tower is a good jaunt up a number of stairs - we climbed up and our stomachs did somersaults as we climbed down with no protective railings. So this is no walk in the park for the divers. If we slipped and fell, we were headed straight for the rocks. These young men were going to purposely dive into the unfriendly waters of an area only 15 square feet in diameter. One misjudgment about the wind condition or the tide and it is game over for them.
Do you think they have a strong intention? In their mind, they have to focus on their intention to safely make the dive. The minute their mind goes from affirming that this is a safe, doable venture to screaming danger and a subsequent lack of focus, they are toast. With their life literally on the line with each jump, this is not for the squeamish.
Clarity, focus and action are all part of intention. There are so many things to take us out of the game. As I now live in a holiday resort, the sun shining every single day, balmy temperatures, a beautiful pool and ocean at my doorstep, it would be easy to spend my days with my feet up, sipping Margaritas and doing nothing. And I do spend a day or two ocassionally doing just that.
But I am really committed to two major projects this year, on top of maintaining a regular, albeit modified client schedule. My next book is coming along on schedule and my project with Sacred Gifts is progressing beautifully. I can’t just intend to have leveraged income and then sit and wait for the sky to open and send me a check every month any more than I could have intended to win every game of Parcheesi and then have never played the game. Wanting to live in a beachfront condo in the sunshine and warmth was never going to happen if I didn’t buy a plane ticket to Mazatlan.
So have you set your intentions and then wondered why they haven’t manifested? Perhaps you need to take some action, get clarity, and focus. Those cliff divers do not get paid for their risky dives. They do it for tips from the audience and they ask for those tips. They don’t stand around, risk their lives and hope someone gives them a few bucks. Trust me - they actively ask and consequently they also receive.
It’s easy to give up when the news doesn’t seem to be in our favor. Many people were astounded at my audacity to just think I could show up and rent a place for six months or more without having booked it months in advance - particularly at the height of tourist season. But it doesn’t mean that it was impossible - it simply meant that I was open to receive a bigger miracle.
So look at your intentions or lack of them. Then see if there is any action to follow up those intentions. Release any detachment as to how they show up and have unwavering trust in a perfect outcome. Go have a look at the photos of the cliff divers and then get your own clarity, focus and action clearly in place. Miracles do happen! They really do.
Have an outrageously miraculous intention-filled month.
There was nothing redeeming about the house. It was dirty, disorganized, and could hardly be said to have four walls and a roof. Built from scraps from the dump, the chickens and ducks had free rein of the abode. There was dirt everywhere and the smell of pigs permeated the warm air. It was all I could do to take some pictures and return to the bus.
I have seen poverty. I have toured shanty towns in South Africa, taught the Bible in homes in Ecuador where the pigs, chickens and rats roamed freely and seen the old peasant homes in Beijing where a whole street shared one toilet, but Gloria’s home takes the cake for… bad.
What Gloria’s home did have going for it was her pride. She smiled broadly as the whole busload wandered through the decrepit maze like she was offering us a tour of Windsor Castle. This grandmother of 30 had no problem sharing her home with all of us. It made me realize how hospitality has nothing to do with what we have or own. It’s definitely a Sacred Gift.
Life in Mazatlan continues to fascinate, intrigue and humble me. There is something absolutely glorious about waking up to sunshine every morning and going to sleep lulled by the sound of the ocean. The people’s kindness, generosity and friendliness constantly impresses me. Yesterday I got on the bus and was a bit short on coins for the fare and the bus driver couldn’t change my larger bill. The passenger in the front seat of the bus reached into his pocket and pulled out the equivalent of $.80 to pay my fare. I found out as I talked to him that he had just lost his job in another city and was in Mazatlan looking for work.
I love the easy-going attitude of “no stress”. There should be a thousand accidents a day the way they drive and yet I have not seen one. Despite their laid-back ways, things get done. My internet service in the condo actually arrived early. I decided to have my own modem installed rather than use the building’s wireless and the whole procedure was amazingly easy. The computer guy who took Vista off of my laptop (YEAH!) and reinstalled XP was punctual, courteous, spoke perfect English and did a fabulous job for an amazing price. The maid shows up religiously every Saturday to clean and does a great job with a smile and love for her work that lights up the place. It’s almost magical.
And then I went to the dump last week and saw a different side of Mazatlan. It’s when I got to meet Gloria. Arriving at about 8:30 at La Vina church, a bright yellow building on the main street of what is known in Mazatlan as the “Golden Zone”, I was soon put to work making sandwiches to be delivered to the poor. Working with close to 50 other foreigners, we quickly had ham and cheese sandwiches made and packed in sacks along with oranges and bottles of filtered water.
We got onto two buses with one simple problem. There were more of us than there were seats. But that problem lasted just a few minutes as plastic chairs - like the kind you sit in on your patio - were brought into the bus and placed in the aisle- way right up to the front of the bus. Everybody had a seat - although I’d hate to have had to get off the bus in any sort of emergency.
By about 10:00 we were off through the city of Mazatlan and into the country. Onto dirt roads we bumped along, passing small communities of middle class housing, government housing and shacks. Everywhere children waved at the bright yellow bus with La Vina Christian church painted across it in bright red letters. You couldn’t miss the bus and for many of these communities, this bus meant something different than tortillas for breakfast, lunch and dinner. This bus symbolized safe drinking water, dental clinics, shoes for the children and ham and cheese sandwiches, an orange and a cold bottle of water.
As we traveled along the dusty roads, it was soon obvious that staying clean in my black jeans was not going to happen. The windows open, the small fan broken and air conditioning non-existent, I just focused on keeping one hand clean for snacking on my almonds and banana. I had learned while living in Ecuador that you do everything for everybody else with your right hand, while you keep your left hand clean for scratching your nose, rubbing your eye and eating. The practice came back to me very quickly.
About an hour later, many windy, dusty roads traversed in a bus whose springs had seen better days, we arrived at the dump. Several people were working their way through the isolated piles of garbage, trucks were constantly coming and going, it was plain old dusty, smelly and windy, but it was almost “clean”, if a dump can possibly be described as clean. As we each grabbed a sack of 6 sandwiches, 6 oranges and 6 bottles of water, our job was to find six people to bestow this gift upon with a kind word of blessing for each one of them. As I speak fluent Spanish I was in a unique position to talk to my recipients.
Lydia was humble and graciously accepted her food gift. A single mother of six, living on the $20 per day wage, my heart welled up with compassion for her plight and I found myself needing to move on. It was too painful to think about in the moment. Another group of 3 young people, one with a cell phone in hand, were sitting in the garbage like teenagers sit around the family room. A cell phone, a $45 per month expenditure, is certainly affordable on the daily wage for a teenager, yet it seemed oddly out of place for a dump worker.
We soon left the dump and started back through some of the communities. It’s when I met Gloria in her humble abode. (You can see photos of Gloria’s home and other shots of the trip at Jan’s Trip to the Dump.) Rabbits, pigs, ducks and chickens complimented Gloria’s open-air home, covered with tarps, scraps from the dumps and garbage.
As temperatures in Mazatlan dropped to 36 degrees some mornings in January, I couldn’t help but remember my warm bed, three blankets, warm housecoat and hot shower I enjoyed during those nights last month. It had been uncomfortable for me and I thought about what I had compared to Gloria. I’m sure there were many cold nights for her and her loved ones. Remarkably there was a small TV on right in the middle of the house; its screen lighting the dark room. It must have come from the dump too.
We stopped and met Jonathan, a young boy of about 5 years of age who suffers with cerebral palsy. He is now starting to walk, thanks to the generosity of a foreign couple who are paying for his therapy and have taken the family under their wing. His smiling face and incredible mop of jet black hair were absolutely charming and he although he didn’t say a word, his charisma was more than obvious!
After a tour of the bio-sand water filter project that provides safe drinking water to families in need, we were dropped back at the church at about 1:30. I headed across the street to an Egyptian restaurant and ate falafels and tzatizki sauce, pita bread and salad and then headed to the big grocery store for wine, imported cheese and a freshly baked loaf of brown bread. In less than an hour, I had spent more money than Gloria probably sees in a week - maybe a month.
I sat with the experience for a couple of days, feeling somewhat uneasy and uncomfortable, a certain wrestling in my soul.
What I realized is that it’s all perspective and that’s what makes life so fascinating. I think Gloria’s home was appalling, even by the lowest of my standards. Gloria thought her home was wonderful. I found myself disagreeing with the form of charity I was participating in, as I believe in teaching people to fish, not giving them a fish, but La Vina church is well-supported by thousands of charitable dollars from people who endorse their work. I think their driving is crazy. To them, it’s ordinary. Doesn’t everybody cut people off, back up down a highway, not stop for pedestrians, run red-lights and just “pause” at a Stop sign?
But then I am forced to apply my golden rule of living. What are the results? Because at the end of the day, it always comes down to results.
Gloria is looking after 30 grandchildren who perhaps know more love than many children with parents who both work full-time and have a beautiful home to live in. There is no starvation in Mexico - people are looked after and my God, they’re happy. I can’t argue with the result. As I saw the good work that La Vina does in this community; the growth in their church and the advancement spiritually of the local Mexicans - how many have gone from hopelessness to having a spiritual faith - I felt moved to contribute and be grateful for their work. And as for their driving, well, I’ve seen two “after the accident” scenes that were minor fender-benders but nothing serious. People just move over to accommodate, wait for you to do something absolutely stupid on the road and take it all in stride. Those are the results, whether I agree personally with how they’re achieved or not.
I’m sure that many things could be done differently, more efficiently (just ask the man who rakes the sand in front of the condo twice per week, a job that takes him hours) and certainly more safely. But people are happy, kind, generous, friendly and love their life. You see it in their eyes. There’s a twinkle that is contagious.
It’s one of the reasons I love to travel. To see a different perspective of living, of eating, believing and of being, that quite simply works. Right, wrong, good, bad. I don’t know. It’s not about judgment, although I’m still quick to go there. I want to come with an open heart and mind, to learn, to discover, to explore and to grow. And of course to share with you. I hope you’ll check out the photos.
We’ve all got so much to be grateful for, in love with, and happy about. What I’m learning in Mazatlan is finally to stop and smell the roses. In this case, though I’m stopping and watching the sunsets. I’m talking to the stranger at the market or on the bus and finding out about who they are and what they do. I’m appreciating my abundance and the time that I have to be silent and meditative. I’m taking time to soak up some sun. And I’m feeling blessed for the relationships and love I have in my partner and friends who keep in touch with me regularly and share my experiences.
Can you do the same? You don’t have to be in Mazatlan to do any of this. You can do it right where you are. There are sunsets, amazing charitable work, beautiful vistas, incredible people, sights to explore, discover and learn about right where you are. And there is plenty of opportunity to be silent and meditative. I’m just not sure about the sunshine part!
Just one last thing. Can I ask that you remember all the Glorias in the world and the children who aren’t warm or clean tonight because there is no hot bath, no washing machine or heater, give thanks for what you have and then say a little prayer for them tonight?
With love and light,
JanP.S. A dear friend of mine, Wayne Kelly, wants to raise $1 million for charity this year with a pretty cool concept that I got to be part of. Check out Wayne’s site at www.52motivationalinterviews.com and see how you can help his cause and get a ton of amazing stuff for yourself.
P.P.S. If you want to join us at the Social Media Telesummit, it’s not too late. Running from the 20 - 29 of February, it’s looking hot for a line-up of amazing experts. I get to close off the Telesummit with the keynote address: How to Have an Outrageously Successful Business Without the Guilt. Love to have some of you on the line!
The only noise I can hear is the ocean. Sitting on the 11th floor of the condo I am renting this week in Mazatlan, my earplugs have come in handy for sleeping. The ocean can be incredibly noisy!
My partner Greg and I had a wonderful two weeks together, despite the unseasonably cold weather in Mexico this January. He left on the 15th and it was a very strange feeling to kiss him good-bye at the airport, knowing that I was staying. This is now home - at least until the end of July.
I decided to stay until then so I could rent a place for six months which gave me some negotiating power and because I have a lot of work I want to get done this year. I move in on the 26th of January. The condo I’ve rented is on the 7th floor of a building right on the ocean, and I have a very spectacular view which is a bonus to having wireless internet, phone already installed, fully furnishings, weekly maid service, wonderful pool, hot tub facilities and tennis courts all included in the price. It even has two resident geckos to eat the bugs!
It all happened pretty easily and it would have been even easier if I had been clearer in my own mind. I was fascinated as I watched my lack of clarity about what I was looking for in a place to live create a lot of unnecessary havoc. Having spent four years living in Ecuador, and a year in a rodent infested cabin, I thought I could do a simple house, Mexican style. I sure found out fairly quickly that I wanted nicer than that. I also thought I could do what most of the tourists do here who stay long-term, which is to rent basic shelter as they spend their day at the beach.
I realized that my home, wherever that is, is my spiritual sanctuary, my writer’s retreat and my workplace. I earn my living from my home and it is important. Unfortunately, it took me a few tours of some real “dives” to realize that. Greg described one dark, small apartment as a great place to hang out if the Mafia was after me. The unlit stairwell, one prison-style window facing a brick wall, the bare bulb in the bathroom and fridge that sounded more like a growling pit bull was more than I wanted to see as we got out of there with a very quick, “No gracias”.
Just like everywhere else, it is incredible what a few more dollars will buy you. That Mafia escape hole was renting for $600 US per month. Not cheap by most standards. I learned pretty quickly that a few hundreds dollars more bought me a much nicer place.
So how did it all happen? One night while on a search for tamales, we walked out of a restaurant as there were no tamales on the menu. The manager followed us out of the restaurant and after learning about what we were looking for, asked one last question: ”Jan and Greg, is there anything else that I can help you with?” As we were now into our second week and I was beginning to envision myself joining the homeless camped out around the bonfire a few blocks away when Greg left, I immediately replied, “I am looking for a place to rent for up to six months.”
Lacho, the manager, asked me a few questions and told us to return the next day as he would have a place for me. Could it really be that easy? Sure enough, the next day, he told us about Darrow from North Dakota who had the condo that I ended up renting. Darrow met us at the restaurant, picked us up, gave us the grand tour and made a deal with me. The only problem was that he wasn’t leaving the condo until the 26th of January and I was homeless on the 15th. Back to Lacho with another request. ”Lacho, can you help me find a place to stay between the 15th and the 26th?” ”Come back tomorrow - I will have a place for you,” was his confident reply. Sure enough, Juan Carlos, the owner of the restaurant where he worked had a couple of brand new condos for rent a nd within 24 hours, I had a deal on a beautiful condo on the 11th floor where I now sit for half the daily rate.
I have already discovered very quickly that the people in Mazatlan are exceptionally nice. Lacho was one of the first people involved in the Senor Frogs phenomena. I’m not a bar hopper by any means and yet I know about the huge success of Senor Frogs. It apparently all started in Mazatlan and Lacho was one of the team of Mexicans sent to Calgary, Alberta to help build the franchise in Canada many years ago. He has lived in the US for years, speaks delightful English, is obviously successful and yet is absolutely, totally at your service. People have offered to take me shopping to Walmart and Sam’s Club, take me fishing, drive me places and have helped in every way they could. It is a very nice place to start the adventure.
What have I learned this month? Get clear. Get really clear. That’s not so easy, is it? I bet you have an area in your life that could do with some clarity. I learned this lesson again this month because I was also offered another condo. The condo was on one of the marinas, only $650 plus all utilities and I must admit I was very tempted. However, after saying yes to it, I felt sick to my stomach. Poor Greg went through quite an afternoon with me as I hummed and hawed over my decision. You know the feeling. You’ve made a decision and you aren’t happy with it but you don’t know how to get out of it. We’ve all done it and oh how I hate it! After making a very difficult decision of changing my mind and having to make that dreaded phone call, what a relief.
I finally got clear that I wanted to be on the ocean - I wanted to be able to walk on the beach every day. For me, part of my healing therapy is the ocean. I wanted a balcony that I could work from. I wanted to have the internet already installed as I well know that the word in Spanish for tomorrow doesn’t necessarily mean tomorrow - only sometime in the future. I wanted quiet and security so I would feel completely safe being alone. I wanted easy access to shopping and services. It only took me a few anguished hours to get clear on what was important once I made getting clear a priority. Interestingly up until that point, I felt much more in a place of survival - being homeless in a foreign city is something I need to get used to but I’m definitely not there yet.
As I walk the beach for at least an hour every day, I know that I have made the right decision. There is something very meditative and soothing about walking along the waves, feeling your feet being massaged by the wet sand and listening to the roar of the ocean.
So I’m going to encourage you to get clear about something in your life this month that you have been avoiding. What do you want? Ask yourself: What do I really, really, really want in this one area of my life? It could be career, home, relationship, financial situation or family. I have found consistently in my life, and I just proved it again here in Mazatlan, that when I get crystal clear, life is much easier. And I’m all for easy.
So get clearer than you ever have about one thing this month and then watch how easily it manifests. Spend the time necessary to reach that clarity. That may mean some time writing, in meditation, talking with a trusted friend or coach, but please do spend the time. Go through the anguish, the head-splitting indecision where you feel like two people are living inside of you and you don’t like either one! Weigh the pros and cons, sift through the fears, the doubt, the guilt and the “I’m not good enough to have what I want” stuff. Sort through all of those emotions that are blocking your clarity like heavy, dark rain clouds can block the sun. The sun is always on the other side of those clouds - it just may not be obvious to you today. Go ahead - risk sounding absurd as you argue vehemently for all possibilities.
I know I could argue why every possibility I had in front of me sounded reasonable, including getting on a plane and going to Costa Rica for a month until the cold weather in Mazatlan passed! What needs to finally happen is a deeper inner peace in the core of your being, your soul and your heart. It doesn’t mean you won’t feel some apprehension over the decision but label that as excitement rather than fear and go for it. All of this may exhaust you in the moment, the day or even the week, but it’s worth it.
In the next few weeks I’m off to the local garbage dump for what should be an eye-opening adventure. I’ll let you know about it next month.
As Carol walked out of the condo with a jewellery credenza in tow, she looked at me and said, “I realized Jan as I watched you sell everything, that it’s just stuff.” ”Yes, Carol, you’re absolutely right”, I replied. ”It’s just stuff.”
As I wrap up another amazing year, it is a time of change. Two months ago, I learned that the condo that I have lived in for over two years was being sold and I needed to move. As I waited for the next step to manifest, it became very clear to me that it was time to fulfill a dream of more than 10 years. I am now just a few days away from starting to fulfill that dream of travel and freedom.
As I sit in an empty condo, on a chair that is already sold and has been loaned back to me, as I will sleep tonight in my beautiful 4 poster canopy bed for the last time before it goes to its new owners tomorrow, and as I warm my soup in a pot that was a wedding present more than 26 years ago and will soon go to a friend’s son starting out on his own, I am constantly reminded these days that it’s just stuff.
There is no remorse or regret, no fear or doubt. There is an ever increasing feeling of peace and freedom with every piece of furniture moved out, with every box taken to charity and with every family that I helped get started in their new life here.
A few weeks ago, I had a moving sale and a family from the Middle East arrived to survey the goods. There is something disconcerting having everything in your life, save your underwear, put out on tables for all to inspect and barter over. Really, how much is that garbage can worth? I don’t know. I know I paid a lot for it but I settle for $2 although it is in perfect shape. However, this one particular family brought me a level of peace that was truly outstanding.
Dad took the lead in bartering with me but Mom had the more forceful style. She used guilt. It was fascinating to watch her take my brand new dining room table protector cover that I just paid $27 for at Sears and tell me she would pay $2. When I tried to get $5 from her, she told me that it would be a mattress cover for the young girl staring at me with large brown eyes, her head covered with a tiny scarf, her life being transformed minute by minute by the bartering.
Of course, she got it for $2. What’s $3 in my life compared to that young girl having a more comfortable place to sleep. The family’s pile of material goods grew and the bill mounted. Mom held up a beautiful arrangement of dried flowers I had bought just a few weeks before at Seattle’s Pike Street market as I went shopping with my partner Greg. I had only displayed them for a week before the moving chaos had begun. She looked at me and said with sadness in her eyes, “I love flowers.” I could tell that in their new life in Canada, just a few weeks old, buying flowers was not a priority. How could it be when their 5 children needed a place to sleep?
As the family carted out mountains of items for a whopping bill of $80, the father’s pockets empty, he turned to me at the doorway and put up his hands as a blessing on me and my now much emptier home. He said, “May people be as kind to you in your new home as you have been to us.” I thanked him with tears in my eyes. For this humble little family, so far from home, reminded me so poignantly that I would soon be in their shoes. Travelling, far from home, far away from things that I know and love, people I love and definitely many of the comforts of home - that will soon be my reality.
As we finish another Christmas season that is a lot about stuff, I would like to remind you of that - it’s just stuff. My beautiful couch did not make me happy despite it’s exquisite fabric or style. The bed of my dreams that looked like something out of a decorator’s magazine did not bring me joy. The beautiful desk I sat at daily for over two years did not bring me wealth. Yes, those things all contributed to my peace, joy and abundance. But as I put a few things into a small storage unit, some books, heirloom china from my grandmother, my teapot and teacup collection and my art work from around the world, it all fit into a 5 x 5 storage with some room to spare. Even with all the boxes of paperwork the government insist I keep for my corporation, the storage unit is not full.
What is full is my heart. It’s full with the amazing memories of the clients I worked with sitting on that couch. The stories of their pain and suffering as together, we healed their emotional wounds. What I smile about is remembering laying in my gorgeous bed every night, talking on the phone for hours to the love of my life. The successes and the victories I experienced as I sat at my elegant desk that made me feel like a million bucks will fuel many newsletters, books and workshops ahead of me. Those things aren’t for sale. They can’t be put into a storage unit or examined for barter.
And so I am off for a good time, a fun time, a growing time and most importantly, a healing time. It is starting in Mexico and who knows from there. I am listening to Spirit and will go where I am called, how I am called and when I am called. It will be an exciting journey.
I am grateful to all of you, my dear readers, for your support at the other end of this newsletter. Although I write because it is a burning desire within me that calls forth constantly and consistently, I am always in awe at the emails that I receive back. The notes of gratitude and thankfulness, the stories of how what I wrote has touched your heart and soul and even when you write to tell me that you don’t agree with me. That’s okay too because at least I know you read it! Thank you for being you.
May the upcoming year be filled with what makes your heart overflow with love, joy and peace. We came into this world naked and we will leave it naked, except for the memories of how we lived our life. Unless I’m mistaken, there won’t be any “stuff” where we’re all headed, but there will be love and joy and peace. My prayer for you in 2008 is that you and your loved ones experience more heaven on earth.
